Sign in with Twitter


Empire's News Editor, host of the Empire Podcast, and all-round Q&A-hole. It's ok. I wouldn't follow me either.

704 Following   19,445 Followers   45,688 Tweets

Join Twitter 2/11/09

Reverse Tweets
LMAO http://t.co/x1Ema8xjRF
Retweeted by Chris HewittDr. Evil Returns on ‘SNL’ to Talk Sony and North Korea http://t.co/3BijfHPHXh
Retweeted by Chris HewittTHIS is a fact-check. http://t.co/cWsog7prNM
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt
I can never remember what my suitcase looks like. Clearly, I need to sellotape more pics of Joe Pasquale to it. http://t.co/X7cSsYssQz@clayaaa Dear God, no. Can't stand Craig. Comes very close to ruining every episode he's in. IN MY HUMBLE OPINION.@UpturnedBathtub I can't wait to hold you holding me.I'm on a plane, bound for Dublin. God, I hope I run into that nice Agnes Brown.@KiranReveur It was my civic duty.@mottyessex Lovely Heathrow.@lizziegolucky Heathrow. I'm tempted to book a flight just to load up.I know that it seems like all I've done all day is post pictures of chocolate, but this is a BIG EFFING DEAL. http://t.co/cVhemuMMIoIs this… is this price correct? If it is, I think I know what @FolaHewitt should get me for Christmas. http://t.co/gtbcRuxo3aWatch a performance of "I Am A River" from last night's @FallonTonight - http://t.co/mp52HCO4uQ
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt"Well, we asked ourselves some REALLY tough questions, and we've figured out that we didn't have anything to do with it. Phew!"North Korea wants to run an investigation to find out if it's behind the Sony hacking. Might want to take some pointers from Fifa, guys.75p a pack in Sainsbury's, those Terry's mini chocolate orange segments. I nearly tipped the whole damn shelf into my basket.Christmas shopping. Done. http://t.co/w7Ihb2zcVTCan't wait for Steve Delaney and @Glinner's second series of Count @Arthur_Strong: http://t.co/MpyFBhv4EB Roll on January!
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@Gary_Bainbridge Nailed it.Bethlehem Inn: ★☆☆☆☆ "No rooms so had to sleep in nearby stable. Not happy as wife heavily pregnant. Staff seemed friendly though."
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@DavidHughesTwit That guy's going to eBay the shit out of that.@sacha_is_good I'm going in.Turns out it's actually Steve and Eve. Wasn't expecting that.
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@sacha_is_good Zero, so my teeth are ok, but I have no stomach lining. 120 decibels. Disappointed with that, frankly.@sacha_is_good How can people physically hold that much? I drank half a big bottle of Coke last night and was fit to burst. HOW?@DarkBunnyTees HAPPY BIRTHDAY@driverminnie @Pandamoanimum It's a long, long story. Essentially former Apprentice contestant turned controversial rent-a-quote.@staypuft Sadly, I cannot RT this.
@JKKPharm It's not for me, sadly.I'm full of admiration for anyone who can play the world's smallest violin. Such a difficult instrument to master.@greg_jenner AND I WAS THAT FRIEND. No, wait, that's not right.I have identified hotels in Belfast. Thanks for your help, Twitter.@Schlist The HOW MUCH? Thanks!@MysteryBritExec Thanking you kindly, MBE.@ewenglass Thanks! *checks prices* CHRIST!@JKKPharm Thanks!Hello, Twitter. Need suggestions for nice hotels in Belfast. All I can think of is the Europa. Thanks! Love you all, ChrisLooking for any type of work in London because I want to move there to do stand up in 2015. E-mail: johnbrennan2011@yahoo.com. Please RT
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@Pandamoanimum I think you now own 13.7% of Twitter. That's pretty awesome.@Pandamoanimum Amazing. This is all because I walked past Stephen Fry yesterday. I can feel it.@valshopaholic I don't know the words, so I usually just bellow 'SEX!' at people. It's quite off putting.@Pandamoanimum GOLD STAR!My pen name is Bic Parker.@Pat_Bren @OwensDamien I LOVE THESE TUNES! I HOPE THE DJ HAS EASY LOVER BY PHIL COLLINS AND PHILIP BAILEY! LADIES LOVE THAT TUNE!@Scientits *nods, sweats*Are there any obvious signs if a person’s Twitter account is being controlled by North Korea
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@Scientits Guess I'd best cut back on the tweets about wanking, just in case.@Scientits She follows 67 thousand people. What if she's picking people for the Rapture? I have little evidence to back this up.@Scientits Same thing happened to me tonight. My first tweet after was about masturbation. Can't see her hanging around for long after that.@Corders01 ThankshReally disappointed by The Normalstone Of Brisingamen.Got the itch. Made a Star Wars poster for friends this Christmas. http://t.co/6jFjw2eabS
Retweeted by Chris HewittStart singing on the tube, and everyone laughs and joins in. But it's a different story when you start masturbating. THIS COUNTRY.is your name melissa? "yes" are you married? "to you sadly" yes or no please "yes" do you like the lie detector I bought for your birthday?
Retweeted by Chris HewittThere is a man playing darts on the TV right now who *doesn't* look like he could suffer a massive coronary at any moment. #landmark@TimIredale1978 Thanks, and to you!@devincf You could have made enough money to make The Interview 2.@TimIredale1978 Hurrah!Ernie Hudson plays Poseidon on ONCE UPON A TIME. So if someone asks him if he's a god, he can say yes. (Am I first?)
Retweeted by Chris HewittThis is getting out of hand now. RT @BBFC CHRIS HEWITT (15) Strong swear words, comic scary moments, bad kissing, smelly bum@LaureEve My money's on Obama."Five stars for Attack of the Clones? Was he on crack?" - Obama at his press conference just now. FFS Mr President, it was TWELVE YEARS AGO!@TwoPaddocks @PhotoShopPirate @jurassiraptor It's ok, sir. Your secret is safe with us.Trust me . I did not BUY that sweater . It was thrust upon me . @PhotoShopPirate @jurassiraptor
Retweeted by Chris HewittObama thinks Sony should release The Interview. Kim Jong-Un thinks they shouldn't. Who's right? There's only one way to find out! Fiiiiight!"I think they made a mistake" - President Obama, asked if Sony was correct to pull The Interview
Retweeted by Chris HewittSam Neill on Saturday Kitchen, wearing a Jurassic Park Christmas jumper? I'm all over that like a raptor all over Ray Arnold.REALLY looking forward to tomorrow's Saturday Kitchen starring @TwoPaddocks http://t.co/k9KTtTiDFa @TwoPaddocks_Cru
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@joelgolby Fantastic piece, sir.Nigel Farage and his UKIP apologists are rehabilitating racism: http://t.co/8XVOsGJzZL http://t.co/orsltZvPgg
Retweeted by Chris HewittI wonder if there are any barbershop quartets in Skokie, Illinois.They are literally talking about terrorism http://t.co/QVnCSxBedw
Retweeted by Chris HewittTim Burton, @Jeff_Daniels and @JimCarrey on the same #EmpirePodcast? It's downloading time: http://t.co/NMLY6oWLCo http://t.co/hN25iEr30c
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@Mastercupcaker I think so. Just not sure when.@Mastercupcaker It was more of a wistful 'nope' on my part. Context is everything!"What do you want for your birthday" "Google glasses" "Er.. I think I know what glasses are"
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@chapmancmc I was going to, but I ate that one as well.@Biggie_Sauls I think that would be a spectacularly bad idea.@maryepworth Well, now I don't know what to believe.If you're the person who sent me a lovely Hotel Chocolat gift box, but didn't leave a note or name, than thank you very much.@TheTessMorris I'm in, but only if there's a bit where Paddington skis off a skyscraper and lands on the road, unharmed.@jameskleinmann @laurenlaverne @BBC6MorningShow Thanks. Some good releases over the hols!Last night I came up with a sequel idea for Paddington. It's a modern spin on Superman III - Paddington will go bad… BADDINGTON. So chuffed.
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@stuarthoughton @laurenlaverne She certainly was. *Sid James leer*Last Friday Film Club of the year coming up on @laurenlaverne's @BBC6MorningShow. It'll be tree-rific! As in Christmas tree, you see. And teHere is a dog with whom I did not share my crisps http://t.co/ezys5vfG0d
Retweeted by Chris HewittWonderful takeaway outlet in Lewisham. This is the REAL spirit of Christmas, not Black Bloody Friday (via Steve Kemp) http://t.co/vqIJfw2BP7
Retweeted by Chris HewittRelieved to find that Instagram considers me to be a real person. Touch and go for a while there.@ben_cameron You'd be a loony not to be swoony for Clooney.Clooney rocks. Yes, even those Nespresso ads.George Clooney on North Korea, The Interview and "Hollywood Cowardice" http://t.co/n6DdEaHcWF
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@MasonCooper4 I don't, sorry.@Mastercupcaker Nope.
So few spectators left at the darts that the commentators have taken to calling them by name. "And there's Ken there. He's pissed. Again."30 rock knew all along http://t.co/EiGLDyhzbh
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@TwoPaddocks -- Sam Neill has officially won the Christmas sweater contest. Everyone else go home. http://t.co/L8kNu9lQvN
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt@daveszt @Nick_Hewer I'm on it.FUN FACT: Nick Hewer is now available sugar-free.
Retweeted by Chris Hewitt“@BBCNews: Apprentice star @Nick_Hewer leaves the programme after 10 years http://t.co/kHke32ukuS http://t.co/TceWeTefd6” No. *Nick face*@ADawsonBros The Fry anecdote is free. Then I charge on a sliding scale. The 'I saw Sean Pertwee on his mobile' story is a cool five grand.
« Prev1234567